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I LOVE YOU FOR SENTIMENTAL REASONS

I Love You . . in da hood

Hmm, I confess this is a dificult one cos it's a bit non-descript, but as I understand it...

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The Pearson kids have gone down to the local yoof club to hang with the homies. And they're dishing it with their mates - racking over their boos with the gang - chillin and relaxin shooting the fat with their main bro's.

Lozza is the first one off the blocks - she's having so much fun with her boo that she's spillin the bath water all over that pad.

"Whooooooooooooooooooooooo, ooooooooooooh, hoooooooooooooooo" squeals Denise - a hugely sexy, pregnant Denny - sittin back to enjoy the tale with her single red rose. The net curtain billows beside her - come away from that window girlfrien', you don't wanna be catching no chillin' or you'll be illin'. You knows it.

A random (utterly) fit guy runs his hand over his perfectly formed pecs.

(Sorry, miles away then).

Del comes over all Barry White on us and talks from the bottom of his voice. Man. Sittin on some bench he's bitchin' bout his home girl.

Cut to the Pearson Posse jivin' in da yoof club - all posin' n attitood. "Westsi-i-i-ide!"

The random hot man feels hiself up again (you play it you hot piece of..... sorry).

Preggers Denny only has her rose to love - the Director musta known that the guyz wouldn't stand for Denny gettin no lovin of no other fella. Looking remarkably like the old Luxury of Life days she belts out the classic song.

Lozza kicks in with her tale of lovin - her (stunningly) sexy man is admiring her in the bath. He is six feet tall, built like a Greek God and paying her sooooo much attention.

[I'm gonna have to lie down in a minute!]

Denny is back on her own doing some OTT hand gestures. And then the mystery man is fondling again - oh, perhaps he's her man - unable to make the video.

The gang do some quick jivin in da club again.

Sted is brushing the hair out of his lady's face. Romantic swine.

Mystery man is playing with his flat, flat stomach.

Denny on her red velvet chaise and those huge white net curtains are back. Inter-mixed with the homies getting down in da hood. (What's going on with Del's hair? Don't they have Vidal Sassoon in Los Angeles?!)

Dozza gets her foot caressed by her main man and giggles like the little schoolgirl she remembers from Romford, before the Pearson Posse upped it and busted a move to LA. She holds him to her womanly chest and pecks him affectionately on the cheek - he has the horn by now.

[Note to Editor - this is one hot and steamy vid for The Star]

The Posse do their best 'Kids from Fame' impression for the rest of the down-with-it crew at da club. Much diva hand gesturing and rapper-esque jigging.

Denny's on her own again. Mystery man's perfect back is getting felt up.

(Try and spot the bit when Denny gestures the grasping of his bits... go on, watch it for yourself! Just before she has what can only really be described as her own 'When Harry Met Sally' moment).

Back to the Posse looking more like each other than ever before.

Lozza is getting some more attention in that bath (surely the water's cold by now?)

Sted's stroking some more hair.

The Posse are still at it in da club.

Del's missus ain't too happy about something.

Denny is on some chairs in front of a left over from Janet's "TTWLG" video. Del appears fresh from his fight with the missus, legs all apart suggestively. Some more Barry White rumbling happens.

Even though she's all that he's living for they part and go their separate ways. No wonder he looks miserable.

Some more Posse shots. Still in that club that Delores can't keep them out of - darned kids!

Del gives his bird Denny's rose (thief!) and finally there's a smile on his face.

Lozza's hunk refills the bath - told you it was cold by now.

The Posse seem to have joined the Hood good and proper with some reet dodgy arm swaying (someone knock the Essex back into them).

Mystery man makes a final appearance and is still getting carressed.

Denny takes on some virtual rapping and does much Mariah-ish hand waving.

Final parting shot of the Pearson Posse - now I know where Christina and Lil Kim got the idea for their video together - "let's stand on either side of a road and act like The Star did in their video - all arms, hands and bouncing. Yay!"

Fade to black.

Black.

Very black.

Peace.

Out.

What in the name of NWA happened here? Loads of steamy, romantic stuff mixed with the oddest rudeboiz moves I have seen from our favourite popsters. Weird.